There are many things that change in a child as they grow older. Their taste for food might change, they might want to talk less or more, they may find interest in new hobbies, but one of the hallmark moves of growing up is being able to do things on your own. You used to have to ask mom or dad to read to you but now you can do it by yourself! Maybe pumping up the tire on your bike was once too hard and now you find that you can do it. There is a move as we grow up towards independence and away from dependence, from asking for help to being able to do things on our own. This is a healthy and natural part of the maturing process and should be celebrated in many situations.

In this recent season of my counseling journey, I have had some opportunities come up that have allowed me to work with a much younger demographic. When I was in grad school, they teach you all these skills and theories, big words to use, and ways to help people benefit from talk therapy. All of that went out the window when I met with a 3 year old client who just wanted to dump every toy in the room into the sandbox. All I could think was “What have I gotten myself into.”

A fair question to ask and yet one that I found was not so easily answered. You could say that counseling is when you talk to a counselor in a room for 50 minutes about your emotions, and while that is true, I believe it would be missing the bigger picture. Counseling is, among other things, a relationship and a space.

I’ll never forget the day in the summer of 2020 when my counselor said to me “Ben, you should really consider becoming a counselor.”